Post Game Conversations

As a player, have you ever gotten into the car after a game and the last thing you want to talk about is lacrosse? And even if you had a great game, sometimes you still don’t want to talk about lacrosse?

The post game conversation is one that isn’t always an easy dynamic between parents and players. I also believe that there isn’t a perfect answer to this discussion either, as dynamics and personalities can range.

Maybe mom or dad coach the team. Maybe mom or dad never played the sport before. Maybe mom or dad was a high level athlete. Maybe mom or dad attend the games, but are just there to watch you. It all varies.

I can remember as a player my whole career, my parents were contrasting in their approach. My dad is a man of few words, and my mom was always very excited or fired up when I got in the car. “Why didn’t you shoot more? What happened out there? That ref screwed you guys on that play.” I often replied, frustrated, “I don’t know, Mom!”

Whatever the rhetoric might be, I always think it is a good reminder, having been through it, that sometimes (often times) we need a breather to process. We might just want to go have a post game meal and not talk about the game, or the coaching decisions, or the team dynamics.

This thought of the week was triggered by this video, which really struck a chord in terms of how intense the conversation was here. It also made me think how, even if the message is on point, or coming from a good place, the perception by the player can be so different from how the parent might think it is, especially with different ages. When we come off a bad loss, or a weird game, we as players might have an elevated sense of emotion and hear things completely differently than how intended. A simple question or observation can come off as an attack.

Time and space can allow for things to cool off, and your son or daughter might open up more in their own time. Don’t get me wrong, some things can be a bit different in terms of when to address.

I remember playing in a competitive tennis match in 7th or 8th grade. My grandmother attended and was excited to watch. For whatever reason, I felt the need to bang my racquet on the ground a couple times. When I got off the court, the first thing she said to me, sternly, was “I never want to see you bang your racquet again. We don’t do that.” It was so stern, and I got the message right away. I appreciate that she held me accountable. It wasn’t much to do with my play, but more how I carried myself. We as young players need to learn these lessons too.

Support your kids, grandkids, nieces and nephews. All we encourage is that you continue to be mindful of communication and their space post game and continue to let them know you are there for them.

- Coach Class

Clip of the week

3v3 (Plus 4)

I picked up this drill variation from legendary coach, Tom Mariano. Tom is a former MLL coach of the Year & Champion, and Pace Lacrosse Head Coach. I love doing variations of keep away for beginning stick work, so this fit perfectly in my final weekly trainings. Keep in mind,

"15 yards by 22 yards 4 outside men stay in their cone zone (move to different cones in your zone) Outside to inside or Inside to outside passing Defense keep off ball leverage. Disrupt passes."

I think this drill is fantastic. Players have to work hard to get open, and often get open faster when working together (off ball picks/slips). I suited up with my Westchester high school group, and did the drill as well. It was a blast. The ball moves, you have to make constant decisions, and you have to strap up and play defense too so you get to play both ways.

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